Stanford University soccer star Katie Meyer's parents fought back tears in their first televised interview following their daughter's death earlier this week, sharing that they couldn't wake up from "a parent's worst nightmare."
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Meyer, a 22-year-old senior goalkeeper and captain, was found dead on Tuesday in the campus dorm where she worked as a resident assistant. The Santa Clara County Medical Examiner-Coroner ruled on Thursday that Meyer had died by suicide.
Steve and Gina Meyer told NBC's "Today" show in an interview that aired Friday they were still "struggling to know what happened, and why it happened."
"The last couple days are like a parent's worst nightmare, and you don't wake up from it," Gina Meyer said in the interview, wearing one of Katie's sweatshirts to feel close to her. "So it's just horrific."
Steve Meyer said his daughter "was the usual, jovial Katie" in their last conversation hours before her death. Gina Meyer said Katie "had a lot going on, but she was happy," adding later in the interview "there is anxiety and there is stress to be perfect, to be the best, to be No. 1" at the prestigious private university.
Katie Meyer, an international relations major and history minor, was due to graduate in June. She won a national championship with the Cardinal in 2019, saving two penalties in the decisive shootout during the championship game while matching a Stanford record that season for the fewest goals allowed (four).
"The pressures to perform can drive people to the limits, and sometimes beyond their limits, which makes this doubly catastrophic," Dr. A.K. Misra, a sports and internal medicine specialist based in San Francisco, told KCBS Radio in an interview.
The Meyers told "Today" they believed their daughter received an email from Stanford regarding potential disciplinary action from the school, which might have contributed to her death. Steve Meyer said that "Katie, being Katie, was defending a teammate over an incident on campus, and the repercussions of her defending that teammate" could have resulted in her facing university discipline
"We have not seen that email yet," Gina Meyer said. "She had been getting letters for a couple months. This letter was kind of the final letter that there was going to be a trial or some kind of something. This is the only thing that we can come up with that triggered something."
Stanford told "Today" they “were "not able to share information about confidential student disciplinary matters” and continued "to grieve with Katie's family and cherish our memories of her."
"To arrive at that point, one must consider how low a person must have fallen in their psyche to think that was the best thing to do," Misra told KCBS Radio.
Misra said that, at his practice, every patient fills out a brief mental health survey as part of routine screenings. He said patients who "seemed perfectly fine" on the surface answered yes "to a multitude of these questions" about mental health challenges.
"It does not discriminate. Mental health is something which has been overlooked for a very long time," Misra said. "And part of it is because – it's almost like sleep apnea, also, wherein patients don't really realize they have it, or that it's really much of a problem, and doctors weren't actively looking for it."
Stanford University declined KCBS Radio's request for an interview. When asked about students telling the San Francisco Chronicle on Thursday that the campus’ mental health resources were inadequate, the university said in a statement that the "increase in mental distress has been exacerbated" by "challenges of the pandemic."
"We have responded by expanding resources available to all students," the university added, including "specific student communities" like varsity athletes, students of "all gender and sexual identities," as well as "various ethnic, racial" and "religious communities."
Stanford said students' mental health is "the most urgent priority" for the university.
If you or someone you know needs help, you can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.
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