There was a lot to like about the Tigers-Cubs series over the weekend at Comerica Park. Except for one thing, says Mike Valenti, "and I just think it is clear as day: we gotta get rid of MLB umps."
Home plate umpire Derek Thomas ejected Cubs second baseman Nico Hoerner in the Tigers' 4-0 win on Sunday after Thomas rung Hoerner up on a pitch out of the zone and objected to Hoerner telling him, "You're having a really bad day." Thomas then ejected Cubs manager Craig Counsell for arguing with his decision.
For Valenti, it brought into focus three reasons why Major League Baseball needs to shift from human umps behind the plate to robot umps and an automated strike zone: "Reason No. 1, they’re bitches."
"You gotta get rid of these guys. If I were Craig Counsell, I would have punched that guy for throwing Hoerner out of the game. First of all, you missed the call. Own it. Second of all, you throw a guy out for going, 'Man, you’re having a bad day.' He didn’t call his mom a whore. That’s one. I’m not here to watch umps. I’m here to watch players, I don’t like looking at umps. I don’t like their faces.
"Two, they’re objectively bad at their job — period, Amen, Hallelujah. Has pitch-framing made it any easier? No. But they’re bad. They cost you games. Singular missed calls shift an at-bat. Do you know the difference between a 2-1 count and a 1-2 count in the expected outcome? It’s massive. Much less when you get a bad strike-three call. They’re bad at their job."
"Three, it’s all about if you watch the games on TV. The pitch-framing has ruined the ability to watch a baseball game. I can’t take it anymore.. You see catchers scooping the ball out of the dirt and bringing it up (to the middle of the plate), and it’s like, c’mon, man, what kind of three-card monte is this? The pitch-framing is killing television viewing."
Valenti offers two solutions to the problem: "One, robot umps. Full stop. We’re done. Get rid of these idiots and just have robot umps. Red like is a strike, green light is a ball. Done. It takes away the pitch-framing, we’re just where we are. You can’t fool the machine."
"Or Choice B: we keep these bloated idiots, but institute what they’re doing in the minors: the challenge system. You know where I stand: I can’t do any more challenges, any more reviews, any more red bean-bags. But if that’s what you want, you can have it.
"Niro Horner could have challenged the call, he would have been right, and he move the game on. But we have to do something about MLB umps. It is either robot or challenge system. MLB can’t start next year this way. And my prediction is, they won’t start next year this way."