It’s the week of my wedding, and I’m pretty thrilled about marrying my partner in crime. But I will tell you the road here hasn’t been easy.
After our romantic vacation in London and France last year, he proposed to me at Sleeping Beauty’s Castle in Disneyland, Paris. Disney’s been a big part of our relationship, as it is for most Disney lovers and couples here in Central Florida.
Dreaming of fairy tale weddings has been the norm for me since I was about, oh, I don’t know... 3? I remember my mom even laughed when a dvd came in the mail when I was about 22 years old, from Disney about their fairytale weddings. She looked at my dad and said ‘Your daughter wants to get married at Disney…’ his response… ‘she can get married on the moon for all I care.’ He did care. But I don’t think they realized how serious I was, until I saw the price... nope. Maybe we’ll do some little symbolic things, though.
The planning, at first, seemed way too easy. We have a fantastic planner that, although has been unnatural for me to report to, with EVERYTHING, she made things happen that I don’t think I could have pulled off, even with a level head.
The very first thing, I got my dress. It really was exactly the way it should have been. 3 failed shop visits and then after a quick brunch with my fiancé, he saw a store and said ‘Isn’t that the place you wanted go to the other day?’. It was, but it was in a ritzier part of town, so I was apprehensive about what the prices could be… Nevertheless, he made me walk in. And it’s true, when you find it, you know. I found it without even trying it on. And even after that, it was a tad bit too small and I still needed it. I’ve not changed my mind since.
Next was the venue. We really weren’t sure what we wanted, we just knew what we didn’t want. Well, what I didn’t think I wanted, ended up being what I fell in love with. And what means the most is the venue offered to accommodate my disabled parents. They are incredible. Above and beyond. Privately owned, charming, romantic, and PERFECT. The owners, would be your favorite neighbors, and the best kind of family you’d ever hate to leave. Never in my years would I have imagined getting married at a ranch, but I’m over the moon about it now.
My photographer, he made magic happen at Disney, so PERSONAL and he captured our engagement photos and moments precisely how we wanted. He's funny, comfortable, and I can't express my thanks enough for him putting up with us... I mean ME. I can not wait to see his visions during our big day. Talented beyond belief.
Cakes…. I CAN NOT TELL YOU HOW MUCH CAKE WE’VE EATEN TO DECIDE. And everyone’s like, ‘oh you’re gonna love cake tasting!’. Sounds like fun, sure. But I’m a savory meats and cheeses person, not so much sweets. And I think I needed a little more direction when it came to sampling. DON’T EAT THE WHOLE SLICE. Let’s be real, I probably just didn’t listen. Especially when you have 3-4 slices, even if they’re very thin. Holy cow what a headache and sugar rush. Gluttony -1, Susie & Michael – 0. After 3 cake tasting’s we FINALLY found a delicious place in Mount Dora with a French name, that created the most divine desserts. And well, we got engaged in France. Only made sense to go with them! Not to mention the owners, were too sweet! (See what I did?)
Music, I already had covered. That’s usually the easiest when working for a radio station. And I’m STOKED for the surprise I have for my ceremony and cocktail hour. Beyond grateful and excited. NO! I can’t spoil it in here. But you’ll know soon enough.
My florist- HIGHLY recommended by my planner and everyone I know. I had the pleasure of meeting with him just a couple weeks ago to go over details and unfortunately for everyone, I’m a visual person. I need to see what something looks like in order for it to make sense in my mind. Instead, I get a piece of paper with a list of floral that will be a part of my wedding bouquet and ceremony. I can tell you I’m at the edge of my seat. But oddly enough, it’s the least of my worries! I already KNOW whatever he and his team creates, will be the most beautiful and fabulous thing this year.
Then it was tables and theme, Disney, DUH! I can’t tell you how many hours I spent on creating everything. Literally, EVERYTHING. From Amazon, Pinterest ideas, Etsy, I had to create a story. I still spent this week finishing them up, but now that they are what they should be, and ready, another heart attack is averted. OK so I’m still adding things left and right, like more favors.
I was lucky enough to find a duo that works insanely well together for my hair and makeup. The trials were super smooth, and comfortable. The last thing I need, is to feel like I’m on pins and needles on my day. These two ladies, are sweet, kind and phenomenal at creating my special and timeless look.
Now some downs.
I had a nightmare with my ring. It took weeks to find one and when I thought I did, I was so upset. It didn’t look right, proportionally and the gold color didn’t match my engagement ring and the guy had the nerve to say “it’s ok you’ll get used to it, gold is gold”... UM, IM SORRY, WHAT? YOU’RE TELLING THE BRIDE THIS, ABOUT SOMETHING SHE’S GOING TO BE WEARING FOR THE REST OF HER LIFE? I returned it after having a meltdown. And we went back in and found one that was much better than the last. But it was so difficult, since Michael didn’t initially buy my ring, from a bridal set. By the way, my engagement ring is stunning. And again, everything I never knew I wanted.
Then it was my dress. My baby. Since I was told I could get the back altered to fit, I brought it to a local seamstress, with a shop for over 20 years in Orlando, and she said “oh no hunny, I can just take it out a bit, let’s save you some money” …. OH ok cool. I’m all for that. Week later, still doesn’t fit. So I came back again and she let it out more. This time it fit… but it didn’t fit RIGHT, I said “it doesn’t fit me like it did before…’ and she said ‘oh hunny BUT it DIDN’T fit you before…’ WHOA, WHOA…and I noticed…. SHE HAD PUT DECALS ON THE SIDES OF MY DRESS. This is a nightmare, you just used some decals from your storage to basically change my dress up, WITHOUT EVEN INFORMING ME YOU’D BE DOING THAT? OR ASKING? Holy cow. That’s what I had when I left there… A cow. She did hem it, but not completely…. Most things were dragging and I can tell you right now, I would fall over if it stayed like that. I asked her to put in a gusset (lace up back) so that it WOULD fit properly and snug where it needed to be, and also asked her to bustle it. Which she argued that the kind of dress I have doesn’t get bustled. In AWE, I’m like ‘omg I just need to get my dress out of here’. I paid. And left, thinking, ‘hey, I’m gonna wear this dress regardless, somehow’. So my planner found a place where I could get my dress cleaned and ready. The sweet little lady, owned a bridal shop mid-west in her earlier years… apparently she’s ALSO a seamstress. She basically saved my dress and life. The hem wasn’t complete from the previous job, there was a large hook at the top of my zipper ‘incase’ I couldn’t zip it up completely, and the bustle was a mess, and just awful. She felt so bad for me- she fixed the whole job. All in all, if you can’t do a job, or it’s not your specialty, please don’t try to convince people that you can, or that they should just settle. This is my once in a lifetime event.
I am SO grateful for this lady. I promptly sent Michael to her for his alterations as well. His outfit of course was the easiest thing in life. His groomsmen had a few hiccups, but it all worked out. All my girls ended up getting their things. Except my sister. Can you believe that she spent over $200 on her and my mom’s dress, only to find out it’ll be delayed til after May, because of the Corona virus situation? Like we’ll need it then! So it’s a nightmare trying to get a refund now.
Then there was the fiasco about making sure my parents are situated. Should we get a hotel? Rent wheelchair van, find care givers to help out during the wedding, make sure transportation will be on time and possibly rent better wheelchairs as it’s half of an outdoor wedding. Thankfully we found fantastic prices and rentals around Orlando. Just last week even!
The planning is now done. After a few months of just random meltdowns, stress, not being able to be at 3-4 places at once. I had an awesome planner, a patient future mother-in-law and best bridesmaids helping out and making sure everything was the best it could be.
I’m the biggest pain in the butt. I think at this point in life, for this time, I’m allowed to be. One thing I can definitely tell you is the hurt you can go through. I’ve had numerous melt downs over my parents. They are still with me, thankfully, and they will be there. But it’s been extremely hard planning a wedding, without them and their input. They’re non-verbal and require 24-hour care. My mom was a seamstress for most of her life, and owned her own bridal shop in Rhode Island, when I was younger. She planned to make my wedding dress, she would have definitely made sure my nightmare wouldn’t have happened with it. I couldn’t go and try any on with her, I couldn’t have her input on all the planning and suggestions, and she couldn’t go on my bachelorette cruise with me, or my bridal shower. But I am wearing one of her dresses for my rehearsal/ dinner and last ‘single’ night out with my friends. And she will be with me for the wedding day.
My father, is in the same state as my mother, physically. He won’t be able to walk me down the aisle. I won’t have a first dance with him. He won’t be able to properly give me away, like he’s always wanted. But the ranch, is perfect. It’s something he would have been so in love with. Cowboy-ish rustic style, was his thing. So I know he’ll be so happy once he sees it.
We’re also struggling with Michael’s father not being with us. He passed just a couple years ago from Pancreatic Cancer. It’s been such a rough road for us. We will be remembering him, and holding a place for him to be with us, of course.
It’s all very emotional. And so many moving parts that you don’t think of, until you really have a moment to. Honestly, it’s going to be so hard, and I’ve tried keeping occupied to not have to think about it. I think I’m afraid and worried about that the most, and seeing how things play out and come together. I’m not concerned about anyone else’s comfort or judgements, of course I think about it at times… But we’re grateful for still having my mom and dad, and future mother-in-law. Life wouldn’t be the same. I hate when people say things happen for a reason, and these things are unfortunate. But had they not happened- I would have never met Michael.
Wedding planning will NOT be perfect. It may never be what you thought wanted, or what you expected! It’s molded from who you are, and who you both want to be. Things WILL go wrong. Things CAN be fixed. The day will come sooner than you think, and ready or not- it’s still happening. At the end of the day, it’s about you both.
I’ve never felt scared, or apprehensive. Not one doubt in my mind. I’m ready to marry my partner in crime. He’s everything. He’s my balance, support, and my bad decisions. My travel buddy for life, and he can finally take the official title of ‘dad’ to our two fur babies, Maui and Dartagnon.
Cold feet don’t exist. I’m ready to be his MRS.