In The Loop looks at what we’ve learned about the Texans through the first two weeks of the season and asks: What can you absolutely depend on with this team? Whether it’s something on offense or defense, what already feels like an absolute about the 2026 Texans? Houston’s defense has continued to give the team opportunities, while the offense is coming off a game in which it scored just six points, rushed for 60 yards and went 0-for-4 in the red zone. Then Figgy’s Mixtape takes over with a bizarre Cornell story involving students processing a black bear in a dorm kitchen, a wild case involving 12 people accused of stealing more than $100,000 worth of chicken, and more. The Cornell incident actually involved two students who legally harvested the bear in 2025 and butchered it in a dorm kitchen, which led Cornell to explicitly ban processing wild game in community kitchens.



