NEW YORK (1010 WINS) -- Taylor Dayne has conquered the music world, and now she's primed to make her mark in the literary world, with the Valentine's Day release of her memoir, "Tell It To My Heart: How I Lost My S#*T, Conquered My Fear, and Found My Voice."
In the book, Dayne, 56, outlines how she's gotten through some tough times in her life, and how having the right frame of mind is an asset.
The Long Island native spoke to 1010 WINS about her book, her inspiration -- and what wisdom she's imparted to her two children.
Listen to the interview, and check out the excerpts below, as well:
Why did you decide to write a memoir and why now?
Well, it was really just a natural extension from when I was doing the TED talk. I had already been really thinking about it and writing down bits and pieces and moving towards something but more of a screenplay or something, you know a bio, you know whatever you're calling them right now. But I actually went and did a retreat with this wonderful woman Linda Sivertsen and it was like a writer's retreat. And really from there she's the one that said "you know what? This is going to take you a while, this is going to take a moment whether you ghost write it or not. This is a two- three-year process. But I want you to do a TED talk first." And that was what really spurred it really. The momentum went from there. I was like "Wow, OK." Because writing for that was extremely challenging, incredible and raw and took off from there.
Well it just kind of flowed that way. But really if you watch the podcast which is 13 14 minute there's a lot set in there and it's definitely more a memoir like because it challenges upon a moment of my time. But I incorporated it with music and song and in a way that really is how I know my voice spoke for me my entire life. Right.
More than that it was the written word that needed to come out. Was it a cathartic process? I relived a lot of moments of my childhood ....So you write a lot about mistakes being a part of life in the book. Now you can't win without losing first.
You write about making mistakes. Do you have a biggest mistake in your life?
No, because here's the thing: You mean regrets, because I've heard this a lot from interviewers. Here's the thing: When you read a book like this I'm talking about motherhood, daughterhood, fertility menopause, childhood, damage or scars or things that happen.
Everybody has a story. Everybody has a challenge -- one or multiple. For me, it was fear. Fear really took over my life as a very young age because that's what I saw around me. There was no safety, where most children were supposed to be you're grounded in a safe environment. Mine was not. And the opposite was I had to find a place where I could draw that from. And that was the radio. that was music, that was the art of voice. And I took my voice and made it into a tool because those people looked happy, friendly and successful and joyful. And that was my mission. That's just the start. So how can you regret a childhood that led to so much joy and he's given people so much joy? It's part of the process of living. We all go through challenges. And yet it's how we we stand up, how we dust ourselves off and get back on the yellow brick road.
You write about this notion of trust. Has your ability to trust people changed over the years.
Well I found myself taking on bigger challenges -- becoming a mom, a single mom. I made that challenge and providing for myself, providing for my home, providing for my children. Anything that people stereotypically would have said wasn't possible ... my fear for being controlled or losing control or mistrusting that it could be taken from me at any moment because that was a story that was repeated over and over and over as a child for me like 'don't get too comfortable' because it's going to I'm going to whip it right out of your hands. So I never asked for anything. And here it was I had to give it to myself. So the trust was built, one win begets another win.
The trust I gave to myself, building that way. And of course people are not infallible, people make mistakes. We have high expectations. And I've definitely had high expectations of people in my life. But over time, yes I've found that I trust myself more where there's been situations -- the more regretful ones -- where I've bullied myself and dumbing myself down to places where I didn't feel that my voice was very valuable or worthy to be heard. That's when it's a real problem.
