Okay so if you’re a celebrity gossip news fiend like us then you were absolutely shooketh by the speculations of Angelina Jolie and The Weeknd being a thing. Well fine, rumor is they were seen on a dinner date, but whatever, you say tomato, we say a potential rift in the timeline. Whether we’re mad at it or not, is something we’re still debating.
Listen to your favorite music now on Audacy
To play devils advocate, or in this case lets say Goddess of Mischief., while it isn't entirely impossible that it could've been a date, as both parties are currently single. It could also have been a business meeting to discuss The Weeknd’s new HBO series, as they were both uncharacteristically very out in the open about it all while leaving the restaurant.
But that’s no fun, so on the other hand, if this is the beginnings of a much more than just a beautiful friendship, is this something the world is ready for? First of all, what would a Weeknd album about Angelina Jolie sound like? Also one could debate they might not have much in common, but then Jolie is arguably one of the biggest sex symbols of the last generation, and who sings more about sex than The Weeknd? Don’t worry we’ll wait…
Another potential issue threatening the potential couple and on the side of keeping the sacred timeline, are of course the nemesis, or should we say nem-EX-sis. Selena Gomez, Bella Hadid, Billy Bob Thornton and Brad Pitt who all would rather see these two pruned (erased from reality) than taking over the world, or rather timeline, as no doubt the next power couple.
A timeline where we’re all in red blazers, and vials of blood become common currency. Where we all date models or A-list actors, and everyone lusts over everyone. Where we all get tattoos using a needle and hammer and a Super Bowl sized hall of mirrors rises around us to reflect our sexiest selves. Actually… that doesn’t sound that bad, well maybe except for that tattoo thing.
Hey you know what, if Loki and Sylvie have us in their corner Weekalina sure does, whether it results in the creation of a new timeline or not. Yeah, we said what we said, the variant heart wants what the variant heart wants, and what exactly are the fake Time Keepers gonna do about it?
LISTEN on the Audacy App
Sign Up and Follow Audacy
Facebook | Twitter | Instagram