Ahead of his Coachella debut as part of 88Rising's Head in the Clouds lineup, Jackson Wang chatted with Variety, about his excitement for the Cali festival, his brand new album, and mental health.
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The Chinese star, who splits his time between China and South Korea, found himself in the U.S. for one reason and one reason only, his appearance at Coachella’s 88Rising Saturday evening set. But during a break from rehearsals, Wang took a moment to talk with the publication.
“It is my first time,” Wang said of his Coachella appearance, “It’s once in a lifetime. I’m very honored and at the same time, I’m nervous. … It’s not a negative nervous. I’m excited.” And rightfully so, cause Jackson slayed his set.
That said, things for Wang weren’t always “not negative,” which Jackson recently opened up about with his 27.4 million followers on Instagram and 5.4 million on Twitter. A topic the K-Pop star also discussed with Variety, detailing the events that led to his nervous breakdown and how he coped with one the darkest moments in his life that ultimately led to the creation of Magic Man, his soon-to-be-released album.
“For me, as an artist that travels around from Korea to China to all these different places, also working as a member of a K-Pop band and now I’m solo, everything’s different. Last year, I was in a mental breakdown, with depression and huge anxiety because everything changed around me. It got to a point where I’ve been in this industry for eight, nine years: it’s always traveling; show after show; programs; commercials; tour; it’s almost in a loop. I started to feel lost. I don’t know what more can I do and what should I do? I don’t even know who I was. I started drinking every day, but I was still working.”
He continued, “Growing up, I grew up in this family full of athletes. My parents were both athletes, national team athletes. I was an athlete, my brother was an athlete. So I always said that if I had obstacles in my life or stress, the way that I deal with it is I’ll just overcome it. I’ll find a solution, or I’ll always tell myself that I have to work harder. Maybe I’m not good enough, or I’m not working hard enough. The reason why there was a breakdown was it got to a point that it was above that. I felt like maybe I just suck.”
Admitting that he “never believed in talking to other people or to friends,” about his struggles, opting to “solve my own problems when I’m stressed out by myself, because what’s the point? It’s my problem. It’s not anyone else’s problem.” Wang revealed that his producers, team and friends noticed a shift in his behavior and stepped in, telling him — “You need a break. You work too hard, you need to chill for a bit. You need to recharge, to refresh, so you could come back inspired.”
“But I was worried that if I take that break, I’ll be lazy forever," Wang noted. “What if I can’t come back? I was worried about that."
Not knowing “there was power in those words they shared,” Jackson revealed, “it feels so magical to me. This is magic. I never used to believe in this for all my life, then I accepted it.”
Coming to the conclusion that “whoever I was in the past, whatever I had with all my music or whatever — me, Jackson Wang as a character, as an artist, as a person — I wanted to leave that behind and start fresh. Then we created the album, and it’s called Magic Man.”
For Wang, now on the other side, the pressures of being good enough don’t linger, and he now looks at creating music and art completely differently. Saying, “being serious in the process of making art is good, but don’t lose the fun of it. When you have fun with it, you’re happy.” Then offering advice to any one currently struggling with mental health, he said, “it’s important to have a circle of positive people around you. No matter how incredible you are as a person, as an artist, if you have all these negative people around you, it’s going to break you down.”
Check out Jackson’s entire interview with Variety here.
Audacy's I’m Listening initiative aims to encourage those who are dealing with mental health issues to understand they are not alone. If you or anyone you know is struggling with depression or anxiety, know that someone is always there. Additionally, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at 1-800-273-8255.