According to producer Drab, the fans in Arizona are already out for Jonathan Gannon, who has ‘no chance for success’ because his personality is as dull as dishwater, and he played some audio from the Cards’ social media account to show just how, well, drab the former Eagles defensive coordinator is.
“He’s now officially in my cross-hairs of donk NFL head coaches, and he hasn’t even coached a game yet,” Cakes said. “The video portion of this really puts it over – you see Marquise Brown there wearing like a sombrero that you buy at a Boardwalk shop for $5 and completely not interested. No one is locked in! He has zero gravitas; he cannot command the room, and is not a leader of men.”
“At the professional level, the old inspiring speeches are a thing of the past,” JP replied. “His personality seemed kind of dull, and his inspirational speech kind of fell flat.”
Drab played some more audio just to showcase the malaise, and Cakes couldn’t contain his laughter.
“He is a dork!” Cakes said, and when reminded he said the same about Nick Sirianni, he took back those words and admitted he was wrong about Dan Campbell, too – but said “I’m pushing all my chips in on Gannon being a mega, mega-dud.”
Johnny Auville has been wrong before and likely will be again, even if he’s against defensive-minded coaches in general (‘sup, Rob Rivera?), but hopefully this won’t be bulletin-board fodder for the Cards before a Week 1 date with the Commanders…and if it is, well, that’s on the boys.
“Ron cannot lose to that dork in Week 1! You cannot lose to that dud…it’s bad for your job security!” is all Cakes could say. “And, if they tank and then ascend under Caleb Williams, I will not give Gannon any of that credit!”