CHICAGO (WBBM NEWSRADIO) -- Cardinal Blase Cupich is issuing new guidelines for Catholic funerals in the Archdiocese of Chicago, especially when it comes to eulogies or reflections of the person who died.
The idea is to get all churches in the archdiocese on the same page when it comes to funerals. Many parishes have already conducted funerals using the now-codified practices.
Under the guidelines, a pastor may allow one person to give a reflection or eulogy near the end of a funeral Mass.
Reflections should be in writing and no more than three minutes long and they are to be approved by a priest or other pastoral minister beforehand.
Fr. Larry Sullivan, priest director of Catholic cemeteries said the idea is not to "police" what people have to say.
"If I was looking it over, I say, 'How are your siblings going to feel about you saying this in front of the church, is this kind of pulling people together?'" he said.
Fr. Lou Tylka of St. Julie Billiart Church in Tinley Park said the remembrance should be about the deceased person's life of faith and not a roast. He says those stories can be saved for the wake or post-funeral reception.
Fr. Tylka has been a priest for more than 23 years and said he's heard some very good reflections, but "I've also heard the nightmare ones where people use it as an opportunity to tell inappropriate humor or reveal things about a person that most people wouldn't know or wouldn't want to know.
"The purpose of the Mass is to celebrate the Resurrection that's offered to us through Jesus Christ and the words of remembrance are to be brief and certainly connected to a person's life of faith."
These are the complete guidelines, as published in the Chicago Catholic, the archdiocese newspaper.
- Vigil Services (Wakes) are usually conducted either in the funeral home or in the parish church on the eve of the Funeral Mass. As a vigil, the faithful keep watch with the family in prayer, confident of God's mercy and hopeful as they find strength in Christ's presence. As the first gathering of friends and family of the deceased, this Scripture or Evening Prayer Service also allows those unable to attend the Funeral Mass to pay their respects and provide support, prayers, and comfort to all those mourning the loss of a loved one. The hectic pace of our society could easily lead us to sideline the importance of taking time to grieve and comfort the grieving. Yet, experience teaches us that this important component of saying goodbye to loved ones has great value in bringing healing, as we comfort one another as the Body of Christ.
- Evening Vigils – These should be scheduled the night before the Funeral Mass and the burial, but variations by exception are possible.
- Eulogies, stories, and favorite songs are most appropriately shared during this time of visitation at the Evening Vigil.
- The Funeral Mass – Celebrating Mass with the body present has been the norm in our Catholic tradition. On such occasions Christians join as a community of faith in the work of redemption taking place as the Risen Lord receives the deceased. At the funeral Mass we recall that just as we become one with Christ through our Baptism into his death, so now we pray that the deceased will be one with Christ in his Resurrection.
- Eulogies and Personal Remembrances, as noted above, are more appropriate during the Evening Vigil or at the reception following the funeral. Experience shows that sharing personal remarks at the Funeral Mass can be inopportune for a number of reasons. It can create hard feelings if hurtful things of the past are raised or create discomfort in ill-advised attempts at humor. There are also concerns in view of past experiences that eulogies can overshadow in length and attention the Funeral Mass itself, especially if those offering words turn the Church's rites into a celebration of life that focuses only on the accomplishments of the deceased's past, with scant attention to our faith in the resurrection. With that said, in a desire to be pastorally sensitive to the family of the deceased, the following norms have been established after consultation with the Presbyteral Council and the approval of the cardinal.
- The pastor of the parish may allow a reflection by one individual. This is to take place between the Post- Communion prayer and the end of Mass. The personal reflections should be limited to 3 minutes and are to be presented in writing to the pastoral minister assisting the family in advance of the service.
- Christian Burial has always been understood as one of the Corporal Works of Mercy. In accord with ancient Christian custom, the burial or entombing of the bodies of the dead takes place in a cemetery, which means "resting place". The Rite of Committal begins at the conclusion of the funeral rites and may be celebrated beside the open grave or place of interment. In this way, the Christian community expresses the sure and certain hope that, with all those who have gone before us marked with the sign of faith, the deceased is now welcomed into the glory of the Risen Lord, joining with all the saints in seeing God face to face. Accordingly, the following should be kept in mind:
- Full-body burial is the preference of the Church.
- The cremated remains of the human body are to be placed in sacred ground and are never to be scattered or separated. Burying the remains of the faithful confirms one's faith in the resurrection of the body. The teachings of the Church call for us to care for the cremated remains of the human body with the same respect and dignity that we care for casketed remains of our loved ones.
- Visits to the cemeteries where deceased loved ones are laid to rest are encouraged out of regard to the need to pray for the dead, but also to bring healing to those who remain. Certain days for such visits have become traditional, the first being All Souls Day on November 2, but also Memorial Day, Veterans Day and the day of the deceased's death.
