The Detroit Tigers are outdoing their worst selves

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The Tigers opened the second half of the season Thursday with seven runs in Game 1 of a doubleheader against the Athletics, an offensive explosion by their own standards. Game 2 brought normalcy with a 5-0 loss.

Stop us if you’ve heard this before, but the Tigers’ offense isn’t just the worst in the majors — it’s one of the worst in major league history.

Thursday’s loss marked Detroit’s 14th time being shutout this season, or about once every week. (The A’s, who have the second worst offense in baseball, have been shutout 10 times.) That puts the Tigers on pace for a whopping 24 shutouts this season.

The 2019 Tigers, the second worst team in franchise history, were shut out a total of 14 times. The 2003 Tigers, the worst team in franchise history, were shut out a total of 17 times. The 2022 Tigers are outdoing their worst selves.

Consider: the 2019 Tigers averaged 3.59 runs per game. They hit .240 with a .682 OPS and 149 homers. The 2003 Tigers averaged 3.65 runs per game. They hit .240 with a .675 OPS and 153 homers.

The 2022 Tigers are averaging 3.14 runs per game, which puts them on pace for the second fewest runs in a full season in franchise history. Only the 1904 — 1904! — Tigers were worse. They are hitting .228 with a .619 OPS. They are on pace for 93 homers.

This is historic ineptitude. And it’s the product of extreme underachievement.

The Tigers have a $140 million hitter with the seventh worst wRC+ in the American League: Javier Baez. They have — or at least had — a first overall pick with the fourth worst wRC+ in the AL: Spencer Torkelson. They have a veteran who signed a two-year extension last summer with the worst wRC+ in the AL: Jonathan Schoop. He’s tied with the hitter who tied for the league-lead in doubles last season: Jeimer Candelario. It makes your head spin.

The 2003 Tigers and 2019 Tigers were designed to lose. It was worth it in the former case when the 2006 Tigers made the World Series, buoyed by rookie Justin Verlander, the second overall pick in 2004. And it was worth it again in 2005 and 2006 when they turned two more top-10 picks -- Cam Maybin and Andrew Miller -- into Miguel Cabrera.

Three years removed from 2019, the 2022 Tigers might be worse. Given the context, they are significantly most disappointing. They have one first overall pick trying to find his swing in the minors, another on the shelf until 2024 due to Tommy John. They have a farm system somehow starting to wither. What the Tigers have for five years of awful baseball, aside from Riley Greene, is more awful baseball.

The season continues Friday night against the Twins. Leaders of the ugly AL Central, Minnesota is just six games over .500 — and 12 games clear of Detroit.

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