We all have the habit of comparing our lives to whatever movie or TV show we're watching, especially when it comes to our relationships.
And the experts are saying we need to stop exactly that because, guess what, those shows are fictional, as are those relationships!
A life coach named Mitzi Bockmann highlighted five mistakes people always make when they start comparing their relationships to ones they see on TV.
These mistakes, that can actually sabotage your relationship, as posted on YourTango, include:
Storming off after a fight
Giving a speech and then walking away only made two things happen — my person never followed me, which made me feel unimportant, and making a declarative statement and then not sticking around for follow-up discussion was unproductive.
Quick resolutions
The disparity between resolution on TV versus real life can complicate a relationship. People expect for things to wrap up as quickly and as painlessly as they do on TV and they are disappointed, and worse, when they don't. So, recognize that our lives are lived in more than fifty-minute increments. It's ok to take your time before making a big move.
Unrealistic intimacy expectations
People often have preconceived notions of what a sexual encounter should look like. That perception is interfering with enjoying the sex that she for just what it is, and sexual issues can sabotage a healthy relationship in a big way.
People will change
Of course, people can change. People do it every day. But I believe that change is incremental and driven by the person who is changing wanting to do so. That kind of change is not what we see on TV. What we see on TV is a transformation that just isn't possible — at least not in the real world.
Love that conquers all
Oh, how I wish that this last one were true. That love is the cure to all that ails the world. Imagine what an amazing world we would have if love, indeed, was the fix. Unfortunately, no matter how much we want it to be, love is not the thing that will change the world. And it's not the thing that will fix a relationship.
At the end pf the day, TV shows and movies aren't real!
Bockmann suggests that all we need to do is "take what we see with a grain of salt. Enjoy our shows but know that what we see isn't necessarily how things work in real-life relationships."
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