Experts warn always trying to be a 'people pleaser' is bad for your mental health

Stop being a people pleaser
Stop being a people pleaser Photo credit Getty Images/Artur

A lesson we all could stand to learn in life is "you can't please everybody."

And believe it or not, that lesson is probably more important to your mental health than you realize.

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Mental experts agree that certain habits associated with people-pleasing, including "being quick to agree with others," and "feeling the need to constantly apologize and wanting other people to like you," can be detrimental to your mental health, as it "forces an individual to prioritize others over themselves."

Lindsay Fleming, a Chicago-based therapist tells Yahoo!, "Being a person who's always willing to drop everything and listen, that behavior means you're a good person and is looked at as a positive. But what happens when we're giving our all to other people? We are not taking care of ourselves always and not getting our needs met."

Fleming also pointed out that all the uncertainty surrounding the pandemic has both put people's boundaries into question, and has forced them to recognize their emotional capacity.

She said, "The pandemic is a global traumatic event, so that's playing a role where before people had a lot more emotional capacity. Now, they're taking care of family members, they're worried about their older relatives, kids are doing school virtually or they're not in school. It's all these other stressors. People's emotional capacities changed, so now they have to change their boundaries. They have to pay attention to their burnout more because their body and brain are forcing them to."

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