As annoying as it is, pretty much every teenager on this planet has had to deal with rumors. However, for Shawn Mendes, instead of swirling whispers in high school hallways, his were broadcast, written about, and shared throughout all forms of media.
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Never feeling as though it warranted a response, he remained quite, until now that is. On an episode of Dax Shepard’s podcast Armchair Expert, Shawn candidly discussed his sexuality and how he’s dealt with rumors about it since he was a teen.
Besides pointing out how much of "a tricky thing" it is to comment on the rumors, the “Wonder” singer noted his frustration. “There were some people in my life that I was very, very close to... who were gay and in the closet, and I felt this real anger for those people.”
"You want to say, 'I'm not gay but it'd be fine if I was gay. But also, there's nothing wrong with being gay but I'm not.' You don't really know how to respond to the situation.”
"Everyone's calling me gay since I was 15 years old," Shawn explained. "I'm not gay and I'm like, 'What does that mean?' I had these problems with the way my voice sounded. I'm like, 'How do I sit?' I'm always first to cross my legs and sit with a position of this feminine type of style and I really suffered with that s***.” Admitting that eventually it turned into something he wanted “to be really open and honest about.”
Shawn mentioned that while he's had to deal with this since he was a teenager, he understands people have gone through worse. As he put it, "I think a lot of guys go through that and, even worse than that, there are so many guys who are gay and in the closet and must be hearing s*** like that and being like, 'I'm terrified to come out.’"
Shawn lack of a girlfriend along with his mannerisms, or “not acting manly enough,” whatever that means, led people to start talking, which Dax and I’m sure all of us can agree is completely absurd.
Shawn noted that growing up he was predominantly surrounded by females, and how that could possibly have played a role into how he carries himself and how he's been perceived. "I didn't grow up wrestling," he expressed. "I grew up getting my hair braided on New Year's Eve. It just completely depends on the way you grew up in your life and your surroundings.”
All in all, Shawn understands things are complicated and that any response he gives about the rumors won't be perfect. "I've realized that we just have to stop having to be experts and politicians about it, especially as a famous musician who's a guy," he shared. "I need to be really f***ing messy and say the wrong things and apologize and say the right thing after I apologize and be confused about how to respond when people say I'm gay.”
While people have concerned themselves with his sexuality, Shawn chooses to focus on himself and his relationship with girlfriend Camila Cabello, which has allowed him to express his vulnerability in a healthy way. Acknowledging the expectations put on men by the media, Shawn shared how he and Camila's emotional vulnerability makes them stronger as individuals and as a couple.
“I definitely know relationships of friends of mine who are like, ‘Well my girlfriend doesn’t want me to just tell her how I feel and cry and stuff around her, I gotta be strong for her,’” he explained. “I’m in a relationship where my girlfriend’s like, ‘We’re gonna get in bed and you’re gonna put your head on my chest and you’re gonna cry into my chest and you’re gonna tell me how you feel because if you don’t do that you’re just gonna be an a**hole for the next week and I’m not gonna deal with that s***.’ So I’m lucky to be in a relationship that’s for it.”
For Shawn, he feels it's important for men to be vulnerable and to not be afraid to share their emotions.
"I think people are really quick to just say, 'Well, he's an artist so he gets a pass to be vulnerable and a pass to cry but most men shouldn't,'" he explained. "Guys need to just be vulnerable. We need to cry. Stop thinking this is being brave and strong and start thinking it is the opposite, actually."
WATCH MORE: 5 Times Shawn Mendes Made Us Do A Double Take
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