READINGTON, N.J. (WCBS 880) — Throughout the summer, WCBS Newsradio 880 is presenting a series of reports looking ahead to the 20th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks. Our series, "Rising from the Ashes," tells stories that inspire and teach; stories that honor the sacrifices of that day and how that work continues to impact the lives of others 20 years later.
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Growing up in New Jersey, Amy Hargrave and her two sisters were always known as “9/11 kids.”
“That was always the title we were given, which was so bizarre, because if someone were to lose a family member to cancer, they’re not ‘cancer kid.’ If someone lost a father in a car accident, they’re not ‘the car accident kid,’” said Hargrave.
Hargrave’s father, T.J. Hargrave, was a vice president at Cantor Fitzgerald at the time of the attacks and worked just a few floors above the impact zone of the hijacked airline in the North Tower.
Hargrave was just a child when the attacks happened but, has heard the final message her father left for her family.
“’We’re gonna try hitting the stairs now to get downstairs,’” she recalled he told her mother. “’I’ll call you when I’m down. I love you, tell the girls I love you.’ And that was the last we heard from him.”
Her father was just 38 years old and she was only 4.
“I really don't have any clear memory of him or of the day itself but instead my memory comes from what my family has told me about him,” Hargrave said.
She said it’s mostly difficult knowing how many milestones her father has, and will, miss during her lifetime.
“Weddings and engagements and graduations, where he’s not going to be a part of. That was stolen from him,” she said. “I think the 20 years hits – just looking at the little girls my sisters and I were, and who we are now, and just how upsetting it is that he wasn’t here to see us turn into who we are today.”
Her young age and the fact that her father’s remains were never found made the grieving process a challenge – and then she started volunteering at the 9/11 Memorial in Lower Manhattan.
“I was able to come tell my story, be at the site, talk to visitors. And at the end of my shift, I was able to go to his name, rub his name, give it a kiss and leave, leave my grief here and go and live my life,” Hargrave said.
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