Washington Commanders coach Ron Rivera is walking the long goodbye. It's a well-worn rut leaving Ashburn taken by those with glazed eyes and golden parachutes.
Since Joe Gibbs' first retirement in 1993, only Steve Spurrier and Gibbs 2.0 have walked away voluntarily. Interim coaches Terry Robiskie and Bill Callahan weren't retained. The other seven were fired, including in-season dismissals of Norv Turner (2000) and Jay Gruden (2019).
Rivera has that thousand-mile stare that plagued most predecessors. Jettisoning defensive coordinator Jack Del Rio on Oct. 24 simply bought Rivera a few more weeks.
Mostly, Rivera has spent weeks sounding defensive and sidestepping questions over a failed four years. He likely only stayed this season because the team sale in July prevented incoming boss Josh Harris from making a move.
But Rivera knows what's coming. We all know what's coming in January. That doesn't make it easier.
Richie Petitbon never really wanted to be head coach after 12 years as Gibbs' defensive coordinator. But, Gibbs left suddenly in March when it was too late to find a successor, which many suspect was Gibbs' timetable to protect his staff. So, Petitbon inherited the aging remnant of a Super Bowl champion just two seasons prior. It wasn't pretty. A 4-12 mark made Petitbon eager for retirement given he never coached again.
Turner didn't want to return for a second season under new owner Dan Snyder. The petulant young Snyder second and third guessed Turner often, including one loud spectacle in a postgame locker room.
After winning the 1999 NFC East, Turner considered leaving. Snyder wanted to replace Turner, too, but that division crown prevented it. Turner returned mostly so his son could remain a starting quarterback as a high school senior. You know the kid – offensive coordinator Scott Turner, who would be ousted by Snyder earlier this year. A rare father-son firing for your bingo cards.
Turner knew losing 9-7 to the New York Giants to fall to 7-6 would bring his pink slip. Rather than his usual 5 a.m. arrival at Redskins Park, he purposely appeared at nine o'clock to meet a seething Snyder. The meeting didn't last 30 minutes and Turner left a little sad, but mostly relieved.
The late-night coaching change saw Snyder first tell assistant coaches Ray Rhodes and Robiskie that Pepper Rodgers would be the interim coach. Rodgers was a football lifer, but lately just a guest in Snyder's box who entertained guests. When Robiskie and Rhodes refused to work under Rodgers, Rhodes was offered the job. He refused and Robiskie took it figuring it would be his only chance at a head job. The lifelong assistant was correct in never gaining a head job before retiring, but for three weeks led Washington to a 1-2 finish.
Marty Schottenheimer declared he'd never work for Snyder during his national TV show. Two weeks later, he accepted the job. Snyder decided to fire Schottenheimer after an 0-3 start that grew to 0-5. Schottenheimer finished 8-3, then outlasted Snyder, who wanted a resignation to avoid paying severance. For two weeks, Schottenheimer reported to his office for a few hours daily before Snyder relented and fired the coach. It was surely Snyder's worst mistake over his 24 years.
Spurrier was Snyder's next prize, but a pair of 6-10 seasons saw "Ball coach" return to college coaching despite three years left on his contract at a then hefty $5 million annually. The move caught Snyder by total surprise as Spurrier called from a golf course saying send his things.
Gibbs' 2004 return was Snyder's biggest moment. It was shocking to see Gibbs back after 11 years. He made the playoffs twice, but still exited 30-34 with one postseason win. Yet, that was the best era ever under Snyder.
Gibbs telegraphed his retirement for weeks. Certainly, Sean Taylor's death factored, though Gibbs was a titan of comfort to those around Redskins Park while winning the last five games. Gibbs later said he thought the team was destined to win the Super Bowl for Taylor, but instead was beaten in the first round. However, the bigger factor was one of Gibbs' grandchildren undergoing cancer treatments. Gibbs wanted to be home in Charlotte.
Everyone around the park anticipated Gibbs' retirement except Snyder, who watched in shock from his office as the coach met with the media on the other side of the building to say goodbye. With no preparation and a league-wide reputation for interference, Snyder couldn't find a replacement. He simply promoted new offensive coordinator Jim Zorn to head coach, surprising even Zorn.
When Zorn started 6-2 in 2008, the Gil Thorpe character was a surprise hit. But, the team went 2-6 and by the following fall Snyder intentionally embarrassed Zorn by hiring a bingo caller for offensive play calling. Zorn spent the fall looking over his shoulder, but refused to quit in the 4-12 season to force Snyder to pay off the contract.
Mike Shanahan agreed to the job weeks earlier, but didn't want to take over Zorn's train wreck. Instead, he wanted a fresh start in 2010. Shanahan went 24-40 with one playoff loss before fired. His final presser was something out of the Godfather where all secrets were revealed and grudges were settled.
Gruden lasted five-plus seasons as Snyder tired of changing coaches. Gruden went 35-49-1 with one playoff loss and fired after an 0-5 start in 2019. Gruden had been waiting weeks to be fired, knowing at best it would come at season's end. Callahan went 3-8 afterwards knowing he too would be fired.
Now Rivera nears his exit. His constant smile over three years has been absent this season. It will return when seeing Ashburn in the rear-view mirror.
