(670 The Score) Growing up, a neighborhood friend of mine – let’s call him Cal – was as big a football fan as I’ve ever seen. He lived and breathed Washington Football. No transaction was too paltry to discuss, no mock draft too premature to dissect. For the longest time, he didn’t care if it was Trent Green (or Brad Johnson or Tony Banks or Shane Matthews or Patrick Ramsey or Jason Cambell or Rex Grossman or Donovan McNabb or RG3) under center – Cal would get up on Sunday mornings, throw on his Sean Taylor jersey and gear up for the 18-mile journey from Arlington, Virginia to the FedEx Field parking lots.
The thing about driving 18 miles through D.C., though, is that it sucks. Every mile sucks. There's traffic leaving Arlington and traffic when you cross the bridges to get into the city and traffic in the city once you cross the bridges. Not many people know this, but the fourth circle of Hell in Dante’s Inferno is actually just the Beltway. There’s more than enough congestion to break a soul or at the very least an old car’s AC unit. Eventually, years of mediocrity got the best of ol’ Cal. Games stopped being a go-to event, and now it’s a busy season if he makes it to two or three 1 p.m.-ers. The thing about Cal’s reprioritized Sundays, though, is that he still watches every game (a couple times) – they’re just not worth the drive anymore. And frankly, it’d be hard to find someone in D.C. – one of the NFL’s 10 largest markets – who disagrees.
I don’t mean to rain on your quiet, suburban parade, but if you’re gung-ho about the Bears potentially leaving the lakefront for Arlington Heights, just please be careful what you wish for. Metaphorically, the grass isn’t necessarily greener out there. Physically, the grass *definitely* isn’t greener out there. It’s 21.5 miles from Lakeview, the most populous neighborhood in Chicago as of 2017, to Arlington Heights. Austin, which held that title for the previous five decades, is also 21 miles away. Logan Square? It's 21 miles. South Shore? It's 36 miles. Roseland’s 37. The farthest any of those neighborhoods are from Soldier Field is Roseland, a whopping 11.2 miles away. Moving to Arlington Heights would double, if not triple, the length of a Sunday commute for the vast majority of Chicago proper. It takes 75 to 90 minutes to drive 18 miles from Arlington, Virginia to FedEx Field on game day – I wonder how long it’d take to drive twice as far in the Chicago area? And how long can fans of a team that’s been deeply mediocre for the better part of four decades be expected to make that commute? The public transportation argument doesn’t quite hold up, either. For anything south of the Loop, the commute is close to two hours, complete with multiple transfers. If the Bears really want to test their fans’ legendary devotion, forcing them to get home at 1:45 a.m. on a Monday morning, after a 13-10 game against the Vikings, would be a great way to do it.
There are also arguments out there that Soldier’s environment is outdated and that everyone would be better off with a stadium surrounded by Stuff. They want Bears Bars and Bears Shops and a Chipotle that brands the Bears logo on every burrito (I’d go). It’s an odd argument, considering that Chicago already has a neighborhood devoted almost entirely to the gameday experience, and everyone hates it. Like, they hate it. It’s not like the pregame experience at Soldier is devoid of drinking either – I’ve never walked through the parking lots and wondered where the party was. If you want to make the argument that moving said party to an area which requires *more* people driving cars to get there, I don’t know what to tell you. I’m sure the (two-hour) postgame train ride will definitely be a more pleasant experience though.
Soldier Field needs work, there’s no denying that. The Bears have no business playing in the smallest stadium in football, and its current aesthetics are, politely put, goofy. Hosting a Super Bowl would be a great get for Chicago too – generations of Chicagoans could then spend the next several decades boasting about the one Super Bowl the NFL gave them, as a treat. For lots of people, a chance to be part of the 45% capacity crowd watching a mid-December basketball game between Northwestern and Illinois is intoxicating. NFL owners aren't particularly complicated people, and the exclusive sportsbook partnership the Bears just signed with the Churchill Downs-owned Rivers Casino – not to mention growing rumors of an impending team sale – is just the latest in a long line of examples that show they're are no different. The powers that be at Halas Hall seem hellbent on getting away from the lakefront eventually and crowdfunding a couple billion bucks in the process (a lede that always seems to get buried by the Arlington Heights lobby). All signs point toward that happening eventually too.
If you’re on board with all that, you’re certainly not alone. Just be careful what you wish for.
Cam Ellis is a writer for 670 The Score and Audacy Sports. Follow him on Twitter @KingsleyEllis.