Valentine’s Day is not a shallow, made-up holiday. The day is grounded in facts and myths about St. Valentine - a Christian priest in Ancient Rome who lived in the 3rd century. The various stories about the history of St. Valentine is somewhat vague, but the general consensus is that he secretly performed weddings at a time when marriages were banned because the emperor believed that single men were better soldiers. When it was finally discovered that St. Valentine was performing secret weddings, he was executed. One legend says that while in prison, St. Valentine had fallen in love with a girl who was believed to be the daughter of his jailer. She visited him during his time of imprisonment and just before St. Valentine was executed; he allegedly wrote a letter to the girl and signed it “From your Valentine.”
The first Valentine’s Day cards began to be given to lovers and friends during the 1840s in America. I went to an all-boys school from 1st to 9th grade and during the early years in that school it was a tradition for us to give classmates Valentine’s Day cards. Seriously! How wrong was that? Young boys giving Valentine’s cards that say “Be my Valentine” to other young boys? It’s a miracle that we all didn’t grow up with a warped perception of gender.
So who is this young, chubby boy known as CUPID?
The stories about Cupid are less than definitive, but Cupid is the god of desire, erotic love and intense attraction. Cupid is depicted as a chubby, young boy - a cherub - who is equipped with a bow and arrow which reflect his power. When Cupid shoots any individual with his arrow, that person becomes overwhelmed with a passionate desire for love. There’s really something weird about a very, young, chubby, nearly naked little boy going around inspiring deep passionate love.
Valentine’s Day may be born from a combination of facts and myths, it is a holiday that’s easy to hate. The first Valentine’s Day cards in the 1840s marked the beginning of the commercialization of Valentine’s Day.
Today, Valentine’s Day is a full-blow pagan holiday honoring the monetization of love. The pressure to buy the right Valentine’s Day gift for the person one loves has turned into an obsession. I was shocked when I bought a Valentine’s Day card today and the card cost $7.95!
Appropriate gifts include flowers, candy, jewelry, dinner, clothes, and perfume. While some men do get Valentine’s Day gifts, this holiday is primarily targeted to girls and women. And if a man is considering proposing, Valentine’s Day is a romantic time for that and that would include the very expensive gift of a diamond ring.
And then there are those who loathe the celebration of love: single people, recently separated or divorced people, or those who are in a relationship where love has been sucked out like a vacuum sucks dust off the floor. There are many people who suffer from some form of PTSD following a dramatic break-up. These people want nothing to do with Valentine’s Day.
And then there are those of us who understand all the reasons to hate this holiday that pressures us to spend money to express affection for people we should be expressing that affection for every day. And equipped with full knowledge of the financial farce of Valentine’s Day - we willingly venture into the crowds at the mall to buy Valentine’s Day gifts.
Happy Valentine’s Day! (I think!)
