When the news broke that Nirvana’s singer and songwriter, Kurt Cobain, had died by suicide, the immediate reaction I heard from the Boomer generation was that because of the life he led and the drugs he took - he deserved what happened.
As a Boomer, I was appalled at the insensitivity and the hypocrisy. Had my generation forgotten that three of their iconic rock heroes had died because of excessive drug use? Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix, and Jim Morrison all died within a 10 month span. Their deaths were related to their drug use, and all of them were 27.
After Janis, Jimi, Jim, and Brian Jones of The Rolling Stones, died at the age of 27, the idea that there was something unique about reaching 27 was talked about, but when Kurt Cobain died in 1994 at the age of 27, there were new theories about rockers when they reach the age of 27. Then when Amy Winehouse died in 2011 at the age of 27, the mythical “27 Club” gained credibility. But there were no definitive conclusions about rockers and the age of 27; and tempting as it might be to promote conspiracies about it, all of the deaths at 27 were just coincidences.
In the case of Kurt Cobain, his success had reached a point where he seemed to be struggling with the person he wanted to be and the person he had become. Kurt also had physical and mental health issues.
On April 8, 1994, the body of Kurt Cobain was discovered in the greenhouse above the garage of his Seattle home. Gary T. Smith, an electrician who went to the house to install security lighting, discovered the body. Initially thinking that Kurt had fallen asleep on the floor, he saw signs of blood and a Remington Model 11 20-gauge shotgun was lying across his chest. A suicide note was found in a nearby flower pot.
The coroner ruled that Kurt had actually been dead for several days and his death occurred on April 5. Kurt had heroin and a trace of Valium in his system at the time of his death. The official ruling was: suicide. But many people, who were either close to Kurt or familiar with his life right before his death, refused to believe that it was suicide and built a case for murder.
Was it suicide or murder?
Kurt Cobain was known to be suicidal, and there had been suicides in his family. Kurt was bipolar and fought depression throughout his life. He was addicted to drugs and also battled alcohol. The month before his death, Kurt was hospitalized in Rome after he overdosed on the painkiller Rohypnol. His wife, Courtney Love, who was also in the rock spotlight, reported that Kurt had taken 50 pills. He was rushed to the hospital and survived.
While he was admitted to the Exodus Recovery Center, Kurt escaped by scaling a 6-foot wall on March 31, 1994. On April 2, 1994, he took a taxi to a gun shop in Seattle and purchased ammunition, explaining to the driver that he needed protection because he had been burglarized.
One of Kurt’s musician friends, Dylan Carlson legally purchased a shotgun for Kurt at Stan Baker’s Gun Shop in Seattle. Kurt did not want the gun purchased in his name because he was afraid police might take it away from him. Seattle police had taken guns away from Kurt on two occasions in the previous 10 months.
In addition to mental health issues, Kurt Cobain suffered every day from an undiagnosed chronic stomach pain. Many believed that his suicide was his only escape from the pain and the constant vomiting and nausea. It was believed by some that Kurt made up his chronic stomach pain as an excuse to use heroin to deal with the pain, but others believed Kurt’s chronic pain was real.
By the early 90s, Nirvana was the group that arguably ushered in the grunge movement into mainstream America. Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, and Alice In Chains, all from the Seattle area, were also part of the surge of acceptance of the grunge sound and fashion.
The image of grunge was anti-establishment. Grunge was the first break in the rock genre’ from The British Invasion of the 60s. Ironically, the original anti-establishment generation had become the establishment and judged the grunge/alternative music with the same words their parents used to describe The Beatles and The Rolling Stones. Though music evolved with subgenres over the years, grunge was a definitive break from the flowing melodies that were common to popular rock music. I once suggested that grunge guitarists had a monitor on their guitars to warn them if they got too close to a melody.
Grunge was a severe departure in pop music. The angst that was a common element in grunge reflected a new young generation’s contempt of their parents’ generation - the Boomers. Discussing the role that gunge played in the young anti-establishment generation is worthy of a book, but the image of grunge is important to the discussion about the death of Kurt Cobain.
One of the credible things supporting that Kurt Cobain’s death was suicide was the fact that the mission of grunge was to not be mainstream and Kurt was as anti-mainstream personally and professionally. By 1994, Nirvana and grunge had been accepted by mainstream America’s youth. I always believed that Kurt Cobain struggled with reconciling who he had become relative to who he wanted to be. Mainstream celebrity status defied the essence of Kurt Cobain.
Conspiracies about murder
After watching the documentary, “Kurt & Courtney,” in 1999, I became open to the idea that Kurt’s death was not suicide and that he had been murdered.
Here are a few of the credible reasons that support that Kurt Cobain was murdered.
The discrepancies in the police reports drew suspicion. There were no distinguishable finger prints on the shotgun and Kurt was not wearing gloves. Tom Grant was a private investigator hired by Courtney Love to find Kurt after he disappeared from the rehabilitation center. The more he investigated Kurt’s death the more he believed that he was murdered.
One of the strong points Grant mentioned was that the amount of heroin found in Kurt’s body after his death would have made him physically incapable of pulling the trigger of the shotgun.
Grant came to believe that Courtney killed her husband. He theorized that Courtney mixed a large quantity of pain meds with champagne in Rome in March of 1994 to set up the scenario that her husband was suicidal.
Why would Courtney want Kurt dead? In a conversation with Kurt’s attorney, Rosemary Carroll, about a week after Kurt’s body was discovered, Carroll said that Kurt asked her to draw up a new will, cutting Courtney out of everything. At the time of his death, Kurt Cobain was believed to have had a net worth of $150 million.
People close to Kurt knew that he was planning to divorce Courtney. It’s obvious they were estranged at the time of his death because his body was not discovered until days later. And the day before Kurt’s body was discovered, Courtney was arrested on drug and theft charges, while his body lay dead at their home.
Courtney had apparently been disgusted with Kurt when he turned down the opportunity to be the headliner at the 1994 Lollapalooza festival for close to $10 million.
Before his death it was reported that Courtney was searching for a high-profile divorce attorney who could void the prenuptial agreement she signed before their marriage, which kept their money separate.
The leader of the band The Mentors, Eldon Hoke, said that Courtney offered him $50,000 to kill Kurt, but there was no concrete evidence to support his claim.
Even Courtney’s father, Hank Harrison, has said that his daughter had a clear motive to kill Kurt.
And then there are the discrepancies over the suicide note left in a flower pot. A practice note was discovered in Courtney’s purse that was similar to the last part of Kurt’s suicide note:
“I don’t have the passion anymore, and so remember, it’s better to burn out than to fade away.”
Those are lyrics from Neil Young’s song, “My My, Hey Hey (Out of the Blue).” The note went on to ask Courtney to keep going for the sake of their daughter, Frances, and concluded with “I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU.”
Would Kurt have written those words all in caps if he was planning to divorce Courtney and shut her out of his will? We don’t know.
We do know that Courtney Love had a motive to kill Kurt Cobain, and there are definitely legitimate questions surrounding his death that support the idea that he did not commit suicide. However, there is no corroborating evidence to prove it was not suicide.
Kurt Cobain was as complicated and mysterious as his music that defined grunge music. The chronic stomach pain he suffered and the mental health issues he dealt with certainly make suicide a realistic possibility.
The day Kurt Cobain’s body was discovered was a day of epiphany for me.
I heard my generation - the anti-establishment generation from the 60s - denounce a new and rebellious trend in music in the same way our parents dismissed the music of the 60s. That was an enlightening moment and exposed the early signs of the Boomers’ ability to be hypocritical.
Rock icons of the Boomer generation received sympathy from a generation that mourned their passing, while Kurt Cobain was condemned for essentially doing the same thing Janis, Jimi, and Jim had done.
Related
Whether his death was murder or suicide, it struck me that the most tragic thing about Kurt Cobain’s death was that a young generation would be robbed of the opportunity to watch him age with them and to give his generation the same comfort Boomers have when they know that Paul McCartney, Mick Jagger, Rod Stewart, and many others are growing older but still performing.
Watching the rockers we grew up with continuing to rock it serves as a sign post along life’s path. We see them age like we are aging and it gives us permission to accept that reality. We see an example set that you can get older, but nothing says you have to act your age.
Like his audience has evolved, I’d like to see how Kurt Cobain evolved and what he would be doing today. And the saddest part of the death of Kurt Cobain is the idea that his mainstream popularity defied all that he and his music represented.