If you are thinking about having a baby, here's a simple checklist of what you need to discuss with your partner PRE-BABY...
- Birth: Who will be present and what would you like them to do?
- Visitors: Who will come, when and for how long?
- Finances: Will there be a change in income as a result of one member of the couple not working, and if so, how will you ensure both of you have access to money?-
- Parental leave: How much time will each of you take off?
- Fears: Sharing your vulnerabilities and supporting each other in navigating them helps bring you closer together.
- Change: How do you anticipate your lives changing as a result of having a child? How will you embrace or manage these changes?
- Roles: Who will do what? When the working parent is home, will they be given free reign to parent their way or will there be an expectation to follow the routine established by the stay at home parent?
- Parenting: What approach will you take? Baby led, attachment based, routine driven etc.
- Language: You may well have a number of languages to impart upon your child, how will this be done? Will you agree a shared language and each speak to your child in your mother tongue?
- Help: Will you use the services of a maid or nanny? If so, how will you arrange this – prior to delivery or afterwards?
- Intimacy: How will you manage each other’s expectations so neither feels unloved or not important?
- Rest: How will you arrange things so the stay at home parent and working parent each has some down time?
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