Public radio host and journalist Cathy Wurzer admits conversations about dying don’t sit well with most people.
“We all sleepwalk through life and then freak out when we get a terminal illness because we realize we really didn’t live the life we were given,” Wurzer said. “But, talking about it, can ease the sting.”
Wurzer helps a lot of people think and talk about death these days through her nonprofit, End in Mind Project, which hosts a variety of events, including an in-person and virtual screening on Feb. 16 of a short film called “Caregiver: A Love Story.”
Wurzer said her nonprofit, End in Mind Project, essentially started from a dying man’s wish.
In 2010, Wurzer began her “Living While Dying” series, where she documented deeply personal conversations with Bruce Kramer, Dean of the College of Education at the University of St Thomas. Kramer was battling Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis or ALS. He later died in 2015 at the age of 59.
“Bruce’s terminal illness was like a mirror that he held up to others, so we could see ourselves in it, because we’re all heading where Bruce is now,” Wurzer explained. “He just got there a little ahead of the rest of us.” While in his last moments, Kramer made Wurzer promise she would continue the work. “Talk about the pressure,” she said.
After his death, Wurzer wondered how she would get Kramer’s teachings to a larger audience. “I know how to interview people. I know how to create audio and video content. I know how to do a show.” Wurzer took those talents and created her nonprofit End in Mind Project. “We throw everything but the kitchen sink on stage: live music, poetry, comedy, interviews with experts and authors, and include audience participation,” Wurzer added. Her events draw crowds of up to 500 people, which is a big deal when you consider the topic: death.
The screening Feb. 16 of the 30-minute film “Caregiver: A Love Story” chronicles the struggles of a husband caring for his wife, who wanted to die at home. Instead of focusing on the wife who is dying, this film follows the husband, Rick, who had to leave his job to become his wife’s caregiver and was incredibly unprepared for the journey ahead, a situation relatable to so many people. “Rick found himself physically, financially, and emotionally drained but still says he’d do it again, because he so loved his wife,” Wurzer explained. “It’s an honest, open-hearted kind of love that, while difficult at times, strips away the masks we wear, showing each other who we really are and the beauty of our souls and spirits.”
The film screening will be followed by a discussion with Wurzer and the filmmaker, Dr. Jessica Zitter, who will join the group virtually. Zitter is the founder of Reel Medicine Media, a non-profit focused on humanizing end-of-life care, and author of “Extreme Measures: Finding a Better Path to the End of Life”. Her work is featured in the Netflix short-documentary “Extremis” which was nominated for an Oscar and two Emmys in 2017. “She’s kind of a big deal,” Wurzer boasted.
Zitter is also a regular contributor to The New York Times, and her work has appeared in The Atlantic, Time Magazine, Journal of the American Medical Association, The Washington Post, and many others.
Wurzer said the screening and discussion can help prepare all of us for the inevitable. “If you’re not a caregiver right now, you will be. You need to have some idea of what’s coming down the road. These are real, and true, and deep conversations that don’t need to be anxiety-producing, and I hope I model that to others.”
End In Mind Project Presents, Caregiver: A Love Story, sponsored by St. Croix Hospice on Monday, Feb. 16 at 7 pm, in person at the Cowles Auditorium at the University of Minnesota or online.