“When I woke up this morning, I was feeling pretty dangerous,” Browns quarterback Baker Mayfield famously quipped after a breakout performance against the Falcons in 2018. Jarrett Allen may not have woken up with a fire in his belly, but he certainly played with one against Utah, amassing 19 points, 18 rebounds, two blocked shots and three steals as the Nets breezed to a cakewalk 130-96 victory at Brooklyn’s Barclays Center. The 6’11” big was unstoppable Tuesday, putting two-time Defensive Player of the Year Rudy Gobert on a poster with this emphatic slam.
Allen wasn’t through torturing his Jazz counterpart, delivering another blow to Gobert’s remaining self-esteem with this cruel and unusual rejection.
You might be wondering what in the world got into Allen, a career 10.1 point-per-game scorer, Tuesday night. Was it something he ate? Popeye’s heroics were often fueled by spinach. Hall-of-Famer Wade Boggs ate chicken by the bucket (he's also been known to down a “few” Miller Lites). So what’s the secret sauce, Jarrett? Apparently, it’s Alfredo.
“Before the game, I’m normally a pesto on my pasta type of guy,” the 22-year-old explained. “But today, I went with Alfredo sauce.”
The rest is history. After seeing his body's seismic reaction to Alfredo, unlocking his limitless potential like a portal into another dimension, why would Allen ever go back to slumming it with pesto? Carbo-loading can be a slippery slope, as Michael Scott would attest, but for Allen, it seems to work just fine. Let's hope Allen can parlay his recent success into a lucrative endorsement deal with Barilla.
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