If we wanted to play the positive trolling, clickbait game that so many websites, blogs and Twitter try-hards engage in these days this would be a column about why the Patriots should and maybe even will make a run at 49ers All-Pro wide receiver Deebo Samuel.
Including the Patriots among the supposed suitors for any big-name NFL player garners instant attention, after all.
It would be a column all about how Samuel’s life got flipped, turned upside down in San Francisco and he’d finally land on solid footing the other coast in Foxborough, where he of course famously wanted to be back before the 2019 NFL Draft.
It would marry up New England’s need for No. 1 playmaking pass catcher with Samuel’ desire, for whatever reason, to run from the success he’s had under God’s gift to offensive playcalling duties, Kyle Shanahan.
There would be plenty of rah-rahs and sis-boom-bahs regarding an aging Bill Belichick joining the new-age 2022 trend of teams investing incredible, unbelievable resources in the wide receiver position.
And such a column would be all lies. Football fibs. Disingenuous digital dung.
Because if we’re being honest, it’s hard to imagine Belichick making a run at Samuel.
Sorry.
Do we really see Belichick trading a first-round pick at the bare minimum and likely significantly more draft capital for the right to then have Matt Patricia ink his name (IYKYK!) to the bottom of a likely nine-figure contract?
Patriot Nation, after all these years we have to be smarter than that, right?
Samuel is a really good player. Maybe even an NFL unicorn in the modern game. He can make plays all over the field as a receiver or a runner, although his desire to do the latter is now in question and may actually be part of his push to beat feet out of what the cool kids call NorCal.
But the price for Samuel will never be higher than it is right now coming off what for him was a somewhat rare healthy and incredibly productive season.
The reality is that Samuel has an extensive injury history, maybe part of the reason he was passed over by the Patriots and the entirety first round of that 2019 Draft. Hamstring issues slowed him with alarming regularity at South Carolina. He’s already missed 11 of a possible 49 games in his first three NFL seasons.
Would Samuel fit on the Patriots offense? Of course he would. He’d fit in and improve any NFL offense. Which is why New England would have been smart to take him in the 2019 draft rather than N’Keal Harry.
But that’s water under the Bay Bridge. No use compounding that mistake with another three years later. Talk about spending good money after bad, and likely lots of it!
Maybe the 49ers will actually trade Samuel, something they’ve pushed back on pretty passionately to this point. Maybe he’ll land in a new home with a fresh new contract in line with the explosion at the position we’ve seen this spring with Davante Adams, Tyreek Hill and others. Maybe he’ll stay healthy and is just getting going on a longer-term run as one of the top receivers and playmakers in the game.
Maybe.
But the chances of that happing in New England under Belichick’s watch? About as good as the chances of getting Democrats and Republicans to agree on almost anything these days. Ain’t happening.
Dreaming and talking about the Patriots adding Samuel is the current football version of what we all do when the latest Powerball drawing tops $500 million. Everyone thinks and talks about what they would do with the money. First thing they’d buy. How exactly they’d spend it. We do it with family and friends. At the water cooler or, these days, during a work Zoom.
But we don’t actually think we’re going to get the Powerball money and sure as heck don’t bank on it.
That would be silly, blurring the line between dreams and day-to-day life.
Obviously it’s fun to talk about the idea of Belichick’s Patriots making a run at Samuel. Lusting after superstar players like a teenage boy staring at a pinup poster is and should be part of an enjoyable offseason in every sport.
Samuel’s arrival would inject life into the Patriots’ lackluster offseason, New England’s hopes for 2022 and the expectations on Mac Jones’ development in the coming years.
It’s good to have dreams!
Now, I’m off to buy a Powerball ticket. Next drawing is over $400 million, you know. So this is the last column I’ll ever have to write!
