It’s a tradition as popular and valuable as…what’s another modern, meaningless, internet-driven activity that we all claim to hate but all seem take part in?
Gender reveal videos? TikTok? Social media in general?
Oh hell, who cares???? Moving on.
Now that the Patriots schedule for the 2021 season has been officially revealed and we’ve taken a serious look at what Bill Belichick’s squad has in front of its rebuilt self this fall, it’s time for a little less serious analysis.
That’s right, since we now know the whens in addition to the previously set whos and wheres of the Patriots 2021 schedule, it’s time to add the whats – as in what’s actually going to happen.
Of course this exercise in blogging fun would be a heck of a lot easier if we knew who the New England quarterback was going to be from Week 1 to Week 18 (get used to it) and every week in between.
Lackluster veteran Cam Newton?
Next-big-thing No. 15 overall pick Mac Jones?
A combination of the two?
As The Rock used to proclaim, “It doesn’t matter…!”
What will the Patriots record be in 2021? You’ll have to scroll to the bottom to find out. Enjoy!
Week 1 – Dolphins at Patriots, 4:25 pm: A rematch of last year’s opener, how else would you rather open the season? Don’t answer that.
Neither team made the playoffs last winter. Both upgraded their rosters over the offseason but retain questions at quarterback. New England and, likely, Newton get the benefit of the home doubt here. Win, 23-20.
Week 2 – Patriots at Jets, 1 pm: A visit to Gang Green and green-under-center No. 2 overall pick Zach Wilson making his first home start should be fun. No, it’s not a matchup of rookie QBs just yet. But it is a chance for Belichick and his rebuilt defense against to show its stuff. Win, 16-9.
Week 3 – Saints at Patriots, 1 pm: HOFers Brady vs.
Brees? Sign me up! (Checks year.) Oh, so it’s Jameis Winston vs. Newton. OK. Well, at least its defensive genius Belichick vs. his offensive genius pal Sean Payton. Could the Patriots open up 3-0? Sure. But they won’t. Loss, 20-16.
Week 4 – Buccaneers at Patriots, 8:20 pm: In case you didn’t notice the Newton-led offense isn’t exactly lighting it up to open the new season. So, what better way to find out if NFL-ready, Alabama product Jones will bite as a puppy than to throw him to the Sunday Night Football wolves in Tom Brady’s return to Gillette Stadium? Good luck, kid!!! In the end, the Bucs are too well-rounded a defending champion and pull away from the game rookie who doesn’t flinch in the spotlight. Loss, 30-20.
Week 5 – Patriots at Texans, 1 pm: Two and two, so whatcha gonna do? Win, win, win. The Texans are a debacle in complete rebuild mode under ol’ pal Nick Caserio. This may be the most winnable game on the New England schedule. Win, 30-13.
Week 6 – Cowboys at Patriots, 4:25 pm: Dak (Prescott) vs.
Mac! The Cowboys are another team dreaming of a bounce-back season. Aging owners Jerry Jones and Robert Kraft clearly want to leave this one with bragging rights. Sorry Mr. Kraft. Loss, 24-23.
Week 7 – Jets at Patriots, 1 pm: The battle between the No. 2 pick vs. No. 15 overall, assuming Wilson isn’t a mentally, emotionally and physically beaten boy in New York by this point. A season sweep for the deeper team with a rookie QB. Win, 30-17.
Week 8 – Patriots at Chargers, 4:05 pm: L.A. could be a well-rounded sleeper team if Justin Herbert doesn’t have a Year 2 slump. Could the long trip to SoFi Stadium, home of Super Bowl LVI, be a preview of things to come? Sure it could, and I could be writing the greatest full-season prognostication of the Patriots schedule ever written. LOL. Regardless, this should be a fun game. Loss, 24-21.
Week 9 – Patriots at Panthers, 1 pm: New Carolina starter Sam Darnold will be seeing ghosts of New England defenses past in this one.
Jones won’t have to put up too many points to get the dub. Win, 20-13.
Week 10 – Browns at Patriots, 1 pm: If Baker Mayfield does his job, Cleveland may actually be one of the best all-around teams in the NFL. Mayfield’s last trip to Foxborough didn’t go well, but he’s probably a bit more prepared for this one. Loss, 27-10.
Week 11 – Patriots at Falcons (Thursday) 8:20 pm: Is Mac Jones throwing to Julio Jones in this one or trying to outscore the HOF wide receiver and his loaded Matt Ryan-led Atlanta offense? Only time will tell. The Joneses will be the difference in this one, which could be a fun coin flip shootout. Heads. Win, 35-27.
Week 12 – Titans at Patriots, 1 pm: Mike Vrabel has taken a liking to beating Belichick, both on the field and at his own coaching games.
Could that trend continue? There could be a lot of running in this one, but it’s hard to predict who’ll have the edge in that style of play. Win, 17-13.
Week 13 – Patriots at Bills, (Monday) 8:15 pm: Josh Allen’s Buffalo herd are the clear team to beat in the AFC East. New England just doesn’t measure up and the Bills Mafia will surely show immense class in this beatdown.
Loss, 34-12.
Week 14 – Bye.
Week 15 – Patriots at Colts, exact date and time TBD: Has Carson Wentz been reborn by Frank Reich at this point or is Indy on its way to yet another QB search? The Patriots have their guy in Jones and he’s ready for the road victory. Win, 20-16.
Week 16 – Bills at Patriots, 1 pm: If the Patriots are contenders, this could be a fun second meeting with Buffalo in a month’s time. That just doesn’t seem likely, unless Allen and Co. come crashing back to the pack. More likely, the Bills are looking for the season sweep. Loss, 24-17.
Week 17 – Jaguars at Patriots, 1 pm: How’s about a battle for the Offensive Rookie of the Year Award in early January. Trevor Lawrence gets a late trip north to take on a talented, veteran defense and Belichick’s late-season schemes based on plenty of film. Jones may not need to do much to get the better of this one. Win, 20-13.
Week 18 – Patriots at Dolphins, 1 pm: An early January trip to Miami is fun and all, unfortunately there may not be much on the line, maybe for either team. That could lead to some lackluster play at the end of the day and the season. Loss, 10-7.
There it is. An up-and-down, back-and-forth, mediocre season that ends with a 9-8 record (still looks weird!) and no playoffs for the second straight winter.
Or, put simply, in the fashion that every fan and media type goes through the second the schedule is finalized: W, W, L, L, W, L, W, L, W, L, W, W, L, W, L, W, L.
Take that to the bank. Maybe the casino. Or at least to the bathroom with you.